Monday, October 13, 2008

Ronald P. McDonald Accepts awwwburn OC position

While I realize this is not relevant specifically to Alabama athletics, I would not be doing my job if I did not report that Auburn University named fast food legend and well known funny man Ronald P. McDonald their new offense coordinator effective immediately. While this might come as a shocking move to many head coach Tommy Tuberville feels this is the best solution for his team's offense woes after his Tigers dropped a 25-22 stunner at home to lowly Arkansas on Saturday.

On a 4:15am phone call last night Tuberville gave Inside the Tide the scoop.

"Our offense has been a joke for a long, long time and we feel that Ronald, with his clown experience can add a lot to our program. While McDonald does not have any formal coaching experience he has proved successful in the past at making people smile at kid's birthday parties and is one of the best plastic ball pit operators in the country.

"The first thing I am going to do is fix the makeup of our players." When asked what he felt was wrong with the mental makeup of his players McDonald responded, "No. I am talking about actual makeup...for their faces."

Another key element McDonald brings to Auburn is his great style. Not coaching style, actual style. While he does not dress quite as dapper as Head Coach Tuberville, his MC Hammer pants and striped socks should fit in nicely with the rest of the Auburn staff.

A very inside source (The Hamburgler) also told me in confidence that McDonald was actively recruiting his good friend Grimace (pictured) to quarterback the Tigers next season and was quoted as saying "He can't be any worse than what we have right now."

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